If you’re a shy guy, then listen up! Being shy shouldn’t be a hindrance in your dating life or be the cause of you not meeting the one that’s destined for you. Instead of viewing it as a bad thing, being shy can at time be an asset that you can use to your advantage. The only thing that you lack is learning how to do it.
You may have been through unfortunate events which held you back from saying what you feel until it’s too late, stammered when you got the chance to talk to someone you like or been rejected too many times. However, your reluctance shouldn’t define you, it’s just one of the many pieces that makes up who you really are!
So, are you ready to finally get the attention of the girl you’re attracted to? There are a lot that you can do and here are some tips that you can use to step up your dating game…
1. Women Are Just Like You
We’re pretty sure that you’re not feeling shy whenever you talk to your mother. What about the female staff at the grocery or restaurant? You are surrounded by women (if you haven’t noticed by now). So, you might feel like you’re a sheep at the mercy of a wolf when the girl that you like is around – don’t be! Why should you be shy when she’s around while being completely fine around your mom or other women? You should treat her the same you that you do with any other woman.
2. Befriend Other Women
Building platonic relationships with other women is a great way to build your confidence whenever you’re talking to the opposite sex. You should befriend them, have a conversation with them, and get comfortable around their presence. If you do so, then talking to a woman you’re attracted to will just be a piece of cake because you’ve had ample practice.
3. Focus on Yourself First Before Anyone
Before you go ahead and get the attention of women, you’ll need to focus on yourself and what truly makes you happy first before starting a relationship. You’ll need to do this first as you need to build up your confidence especially in non-romantic areas. This is important as the woman you’re with will feel the difference and will appreciate you more if you are confident.
Doing whatever you need to do in order to boost your self-confidence and not doubt yourself every time you approach a woman. Not only will you have a higher chance of getting her to be interested in you, you will also dispel your fear of talking to women.
You can jump at high altitudes from a plane, travel alone to a new country, or start something that you’re truly passionate about. These things are daunting at first, but you should start it now to see what happens.
4. Get Yourself Surrounded by People Who Are Extroverted
Being around other people who are outgoing and more self-expressive than you are. Doing so will help you be more relaxed around other people. You might not notice it at first but they it really does help. In addition, you won’t have to exert more effort whenever you decide to approach women or starting a conversation. You can also get notes from them or even be an extrovert yourself because of their influence.
5. Show That You’re Interested in Her
Talking to a woman is simple because all you must do is ask her questions that show that you’re really listening and hear what she says. You need to show that you’re genuinely interested in her and what she’s talking about. If you manage to do this, you’ll surely make her interested in you.
You won’t even have to tell her more about yourself in case you meet a new girl that you’re really attracted to. Just give her the time and opportunity to share about what she does, where she’s from, and what she likes, and she’ll surely feel that you are interested in her and that a connection is starting to form.
6. Change Your Outlook on Rejection
Knowing whether you’re going to get rejected or not will be a godsend to many people who wants to make the whole dating process much easier. That may sound nice, but it obviously doesn’t exist, hence the need for us to go through all the effort of trying to build connections with the opposite sex. So, what should you do if you have a constant fear of rejection?
Simple, you just need to know that when someone rejects you, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s all on you. It can be about the way you approached her on your first meeting, or she may like other types of guys which is understandable because we all have different preferences. You just need to think that it’s not personal because she’s just a stranger, right?
7. Do What You Love to Do
When you go and do the things that gives you happiness and you spend time to be better at it, women and other people will instantly be attracted to you. Not only that, you won’t even feel shy in most of these moments as you are confident in what you’re doing or fully engrossed on what you’re doing.
If you’re lucky, you might meet a woman unexpectedly who also loves what you do. This will surely be a win for you as both of you already share something that you love, and you can use it to build a deeper connection.
8. Change Your Mindset
If you’re a guy who had experienced a lot of bad dating experiences, you should start the first steps in moving on from the past. The man who got rejected and who you are now are very different people (even though you haven’t noticed it), and your past experiences doesn’t define you. Having a negative mindset towards dating will not help, instead, it will be an obstacle for you that will result in you losing hope. Ultimately, the negativity will hinder you from finding the woman for you.
You should always believe that you will find your match someday and that your dating life will improve a lot compared to the past. If you always have this positive thought, it will be easier for you to make good memories that you can look back on in the future. Aside from that, when you fail, you won’t indulge in self-pity but find the lessons that you can take from the situation.
9. Change Your Goal
What if, moving forward, you totally altered the way you see yourself when you’re approaching women? What if the end goal was no longer to get her number, or get on a date, and it was just to get better at interacting with women?
If someone slips away, that’s going to be just fine, as you’re still starting to learn and being a little better little by little. If you do this, then dating is a game which you can beat.
10. Don’t Hide Your Shyness
Your timid personality is not something to be ashamed of because it is a part of you. So long as it doesn’t prevent you from having a normal life and building relationships, then it’s a good thing. Honestly, most women find men who are humble very attractive, so you should take it as a blessing than a curse.
The same is true for guys who still haven’t realised that they’re amazing and doesn’t want themselves to be at the focus of the spotlight. It’ll be quite annoying if you are always the loudest person in the room because you’ll end up being viewed by women as a douchebag.
The person that you are right now is great and you shouldn’t believe anyone who’s saying otherwise. But if you develop that already amazing personality, make yourself comfortable around people, and believe in yourself, that will be seen by women and they will appreciate it.
You don’t need to change who you are! Just be yourself, be honest, and have trust in yourself so that you’ll find the right woman for you.
Why Did She Send Me A Message First?
On the off chance that a girl messages you first, she’s giving you an encouragement to proceed with starting a conversation and that is what you must to do. This simply means making your text messages to her resemble the ones that she sends you. If she’s sending short, concise messages, then you should do so too.
When Should I Ask A Girl Out?
To know whether you must ask a young lady out, search for some signs that she may like you back. For example, she begins talking to you a lot of grins or just talk to you more often than usual. If she appears to embrace, touch, or compliment you frequently, you can truly be certain that she’s into you.